Who needs an insane spring diet? Vv Magazine’s Alexandra Gill decided to do some serious slimming down by waist training like the Kardashians. That’s right — wearing a corset is the new starving yourself. Can you handle it? Check out our dedicated author’s day-by-day experience in “I Trained My Waist Like Kim Kardashian For 2 Weeks” to decide for yourself…
Kim Kardashian is not a role model I would normally consider emulating. But you must admit that her hourglass figure is one of the great unnatural wonders of the world. So, when I discovered the secret to her Barbie doll proportions – waist training – I told my inner feminist to take a hike as I sought out a professional corsetière.
Melanie Talkington’s Vancouver-based Lace Embrace Atelier is a girly girl’s dream boudoir; the shop’s shelves are overflowing with silk stockings, flimsy peignoirs, and, of course, lace-up corsets. The back of the boutique is filled with vintage body shapers – Talkington owns the largest collection of antique corsets in the world, with more than 300 pieces ranging from the 18th century to the 1960s. (Kimmy was a little late to the trend.)
Two years ago, Talkington loaned 40 vintage pieces to the prestigious Musée des Arts Décoratifs in Paris for “Fashioning the Body: An Intimate History of the Silhouette,” an exhibit at the Louvre. It was there that she met the infamous Mr. Pearl, corsètier to the stars (including Jean Paul Gaultier and Dita Von Teese). He was cordial with Talkington until he watched in horror as she gorged on a single chocolate-covered strawberry. Gasp! Corset extremists don’t dare sully their cinched figures with real food. They apparently subsist on bone broth and small sips of air.
The Paris exhibit is now coming to New York City, where it will be on display at the Bard Graduate Center from April 3 to July 26. To celebrate the North American launch and help raise funds for her own antique corset museum, Talkington will be hosting the Grand Corset Ball in New York on March 28. Cathie Jung, the 78-year-old Guinness World Record holder of the smallest corseted waist (15 inches), will preside as Queen of the Ball. Kim and Kanye have yet to RSVP.
Talkington, who specializes in custom-made fashion and medical corsets, has seen her sales increase steadily since opening her atelier in 1997. But after Kardashian Instagrammed her wasp-waisted welfie last summer, business began ringing off the hook. Talkington says she still receives at least two or three Kardashian-related shop visits or calls a day.
There was a fascinating cross-section of customers in the shop the afternoon I visited: a young hippie couple (no matter how he hard he tried to cajole her, she was never going to strap herself into a corset), a young woman from the Philippines (she said Talkington’s creations were far superior to any corset she could find back home), and an older woman who was having a corset custom-made to correct her curvature of the spine. Talkington says she also services a regular stream of female body builders, who are sent by their trainers to carve curves out their tiny-yet-stubbornly-square boyish torsos.
Talkington laced me into an “Alyce” corset, which rests under the bust and sits low on the pelvis. Uggh! Cough. Hack. Wheeze. She compressed my waist seven inches. Seven! That’s nearly a quarter of its normal circumference.
“It’s highly improbable that Kim Kardashian could achieve such remarkable results with the cheap, commercial, boneless Lycra V-Zip corsets she’s been flogging on social media.”
I felt as if I’d been wrapped in robot cladding and squeezed like a toothpaste tube. As with all of Talkington’s designs, the boning was French steel. She says it’s highly improbable that Kardashian could achieve such remarkable results with the cheap, commercial, boneless Lycra V-Zip corsets she’s been flogging on social media.
Then Talkington gave me a reality check. I would have to wear the corset for four to six hours a day for a whole month to lose an inch off my waist. And even then the results would only be temporary. I’d have to keep wearing the corset to maintain the internal fat, organ, and rib case reshaping. The first three months and inches are fairly easy, but then the slimming slows down considerably. For her bridal clients, she fits them with a waist trainer at least a year ahead of the wedding.
“The corset is supposed to fit like a gentle body hug, but I honestly haven’t felt this much discomfort since I was rushed to the hospital two years ago with appendicitis.”
Still sucking for air as I waddled out of the shop, I worried that a whole month might seriously kill me. I settled for two weeks. Here’s how it went….
Day One
Riding the bus home from the shop, I feel like a turtle in danger of tipping over. The corset is supposed to fit like a gentle body hug, but I honestly haven’t felt this much discomfort since I was rushed to the hospital two years ago with appendicitis.
Day Two
I stare down the corset. Nope, not today.
Day Three
I lace Alyce up much looser. Talkington recommends a one-inch reduction for the breaking-in period. But I’m on a fast track to get this experiment over as soon as possible. A three-inch compression is actually quite manageable for a couple of hours – except when I try to do some basic house cleaning. Those childhood ballet classes come in handy. Plié squats and curtsies are the only positions in which I can retrieve my dirty laundry from the floor.
Day Five
Oooh. I actually enjoy the elongated posture Alyce offers at my work desk. And she supports my tummy rolls better than Spandex yoga pants. (Talkington taught me how to pull up my paunch to avoid an upside-down muffin top.) I have to stand up every half hour or so to walk around a bit. But given our increasingly sedentary lifestyles, this can’t be a bad thing.
Day Six
Aunt Flo has come to visit with all her joyless cramps and crankiness. There’s no damn way I’ll be strapping myself into that sucker today.
Day Nine
Tip of the day: Prepare your lunch before unlacing. When your tummy bounces back to its normal position, it growls like a lion. While compressed, I’m not hungry at all. I guess that’s why some people compare waist training to an external gastric bypass.
Day Eleven
I’m up to three hours a day. I definitely feel taller, straighter, flatter, and tighter. I’m getting better at lacing myself in and out. I can almost do it without looking in the mirror
Day Thirteen
Lessons learned from a night out on the town in a corset: Do not drink prosecco or any other carbonated beverages. The gas just sits there on top of the tummy. Up or down, it has to exit the body somehow. And don’t drink too much because you won’t feel the effects until you get home and lace out. Once the blood starts flowing again – BOOM, instant intoxication.
Day Fourteen
I can now suffer Alyce for four hours at a time and my normal waist measurement is down half an inch. That’s either because:
A) I’m not eating as much.
B) I cheat when I measure myself.
C) I’ve been exercising more.
D) It works.
I think I’m going to stick with Alyce for a couple more months. Not for my waistline, but for my posture. She’s a strict taskmaster who stops me from slumping over my computer. And she’s less expensive than a stand-up desk.
Would you give waist training a go a la Kim Kardashian? Let Vv Magazine know your thoughts on “I Trained My Waist Like Kim Kardashian for 2 Weeks” in the comments below or tweet us @ViewTheVibe.