One night stands get a bad reputation for being drunken mistakes of the blackout variety or desperate measures taken by the sexually deprived. There’s no need to be embarrassed. Turn that walk of shame into a stride of pride with these simple one-night stand dos and don’ts…
DON’T: Get Wasted
Just because it’s a one-time thing doesn’t mean you have to get out-of-your-mind blitzed to get your freak on. That’s when mistakes happen, like going home with someone you’d normally find repulsive – or, you know, contracting syphilis. Besides, you shouldn’t need booze to chill your nerves because, let’s be serious, you should be more worried about your performance when you’re sleeping with someone you’d actually hope to date long-term.
DO: Go Home Together ASAP
When you realize you’re both into getting it on, politely pick which one of you will host the hook-up, hop in a cab, and get busy. There’s no point in going out for food or another drink. You already know what’s on the menu for the evening. Just take it…
DON’T: Be Unsafe
Don’t have condoms? 7/11 does. Just because it’s inconvenient and/or embarrassing to make a pit-stop for protection doesn’t mean you should risk disease or, um, offspring you didn’t intend to have.
DO: Make Polite Plans to Leave
Don’t want to stay the night? Fair enough. Sometimes it’s easier to avoid brunch by not falling asleep in the first place. Be a gent or a lady and make a point of mentioning that you’ve got early morning plans before you get naked… even if it’s a white lie. It’s what they’d do on Downton Abbey – I’m almost sure of it.
DON’T: Get Dressed Immediately After
Even if you haven’t exchanged last names, that doesn’t mean you should treat the situation like a business transaction. Be respectful and stay a while afterwards. Have a little bedroom talk before you go searching for your socks. Besides, a little post-coital chatter is no more intimate than what you just did with each other, right?
DO: Give a Good-bye Kiss on the Cheek
A high-five is royally uncool and an open-mouth kiss says, I really want to see you again.
DON’T: Exchange Numbers
If you don’t want it to be anymore than a one-time thing, don’t encourage false hope. It’s unfair and might lead to hate-texts in the future. That means no “friending” on Facebook either because, despite what some of the millennials believe, that’s even more messed up.
DO: Leave On Good Terms
Say something like, “Tonight has been lovely,” before you leave, because hopefully it really was. There’s no reason to turn yet another semi-stranger into someone you have to avoid awkwardly on the street. Being sweet will always do you favours in the long-run.
Are you ready for a kickass one-night stand this weekend? Comment below or tweet us @ViewtheVibe.