As we draw ever closer to 50 Shades of Grey’s February 14 release date, the paraphernalia capitalizing on the film’s popularity is reaching critical mass. From Kegel balls to spanking cream, we can officially now say that we’ve truly seen everything…

If you feel like you’ve exhausted all the options the Kama Sutra has to offer, and are lusting for a spicy treat for you and your special someone this Valentine’s Day, look no further. Inspired by erotica-novel-turned-feature-film 50 Shades of Grey, Vv Magazine has rounded up a list of 50 products that will help you relieve your favourite kinky moments from the ~~mommy porn~~ motion picture. The options are endless, ranging from creepy to sexy to hilarious to… well, you’ll have to see them for yourself. If you’re a 50 Shades of Grey fan, this list will be like Christmas coming late (though that is better than early, right?). If you’re more BCBG than BDSM, don’t worry — this list of weird 50 Shades of Grey products will be great to help your crack a few jokes and maybe some whips.